Mmmm, an Enema Award? An award in the form of intestine cleaning? Or what? Via his mouth? His brain via his ears? (Also known as a brain drain — in this case a vacuum cleaner.)

How about:

• An Enigma Award (because this level of egotistic narcissism is incomprehensible in the light of evolution theory, as it will lead to mass extinction),
• An Echolalia Award (for redundancy in parroting);
• The Eddy Award — known in the Middle East as the Dancing Derwish Award (for never ending revolting prevarication)?